Getting through it.

I'm missing my husband like crazy right now.. I do all the time, but now more than ever. We're getting closer to homecoming but each day feels like a week sometimes. I feel so strong. I feel stronger than ever.. I feel that nothing can tear us apart, we are unstoppable. Our love is unbreakable.. There is nothing we can't get through. Every phone call we share is so exciting and fun.. It helps so much to hear his voice and to know he's doing well.

I've been having the worst anxiety lately and I am trying so hard to get it under control. It's so selfish of me to be freaking out like this.. When my husband isn't gone for that long, and he's not in any danger. I don't know why it hit me so hard, I just love him. I don't feel sorry for myself, I just want to stop having anxiety attacks so badly. It's not healthy.. I don't feel strong when I have them. I feel like a failure. I've been working on my breathing and that's been helping a lot, but there's still a whole in my heart that only my husband can fix. I can't wait to see him.. It feels like he's been gone forever. I can't wait to go home together and see our families.. We miss them so much. I can't wait to see baby J.. I hope he still remembers me :) And the twins, and Mady. I miss my babies.

I am so thankful for the girlfriends I have down here.. You guys are the best and are making this deployment a whole lot easier!